To My Assistant

Notes for my future assistant. Let's both of us hope that I don't change too much in between now and whenever it is I have enough wealth and importance to hire you.

Phones (getting what I paid for)

I will not buy a new cell phone, which is not a Blackberry or an iPhone, and then get mad at you when you’re unable to change the locations of the applications on its screen, “like on a Blackberry or an iPhone.”