To My Assistant

Notes for my future assistant. Let's both of us hope that I don't change too much in between now and whenever it is I have enough wealth and importance to hire you.

Butter (your responsibility for)

When the temperature of the butter that came with my lunch is not to my liking, I will calmly ask you to bring me some that is colder or warmer, rather than throwing a full blown temper tantrum and insisting that “you should have checked before giving this to me!”