To My Assistant

Notes for my future assistant. Let's both of us hope that I don't change too much in between now and whenever it is I have enough wealth and importance to hire you.

Texts (unnecessarily worrisome)

I will not text you, “Hi” over the weekend, and then not reply to your cheerful, “Hi!” for the next four hours, causing you to have to compulsively check your email, texts, and phone call log every 10 seconds, for fear that you’re missing an important follow up to my original message, which, as it turns out, I meant to send to someone else anyway.

  1. tomyassistant posted this