To My Assistant

Notes for my future assistant. Let's both of us hope that I don't change too much in between now and whenever it is I have enough wealth and importance to hire you.

Terms & Conditions

PLEASE READ THE FOLLOWING TERMS AND CONDITIONS CAREFULLY.

All characters appearing in this blog are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.


By using Tomyassistant.com Web site (the ‘Web Site’ or ‘Tomyassistant.com’ or ‘TMA’), you are deemed to have agreed to these terms and conditions of use. TMA may change the Terms and Conditions from time to time and at any time, and without actual notice to you. All such changes to these Terms and Conditions will appear on the Web Site. By using this site after we post any changes, you agree to accept those changes, whether or not you have reviewed them. If at any time you choose not to accept these Terms and Conditions of use, your only recourse is to immediately discontinue the use of this site.

ALL OF THE POSTS AND ANY OTHER MEDIA/TEXT HEREIN, UNLESS OTHERWISE NOTED, ARE COPYRIGHTED BY TO MY ASSISTANT, INC. NO PART OF THIS SITE, OR ANY OF THE CONTENT CONTAINED HEREIN, MAY BE USED OR REPRODUCED IN ANY MANNER WHATSOEVER WITHOUT EXPRESSED PERMISSION OF THE COPYRIGHT HOLDER. 

User Conduct

This Web Site and any communications service, including the capability to contribute material through the contribution form (each such submission, a ‘Contribution’) or other interactive service that may be available to you on or through this site (collectively, the ‘Services’) are provided to you solely for entertainment purposes. By using the Web Site and Services you agree: (a) to provide true, accurate, current and complete information about yourself as prompted by the subscription form, contribution form and any registration form. If any information provided by you is untrue, inaccurate, not current or incomplete, TMA reserves the right to terminate your subscription and refuse any and all current or future use of the Services.

Without limitation of the foregoing, you agree to not use the Web Site or Services to:

·       Upload, post, publish, e-mail, reproduce, distribute or otherwise transmit any Content that victimizes, harasses, degrades, or intimidates an individual or group of individuals on the basis of religion, gender, sexual orientation, race, ethnicity, age, or disability;

·       Upload, post, publish, e-mail, reproduce, distribute or otherwise transmit any information, data, text, music, sound, photographs, graphics, video, messages or other materials, including any Contribution, (collectively, ‘Content’), that is unlawful, harmful, threatening, embarrassing, abusive, harassing, tortious, defamatory, vulgar, obscene, libelous, deceptive, fraudulent, contains explicit or graphic descriptions or accounts of sexual acts, invasive of another’s privacy, or hateful;

·       'Stalk' another;

·       Harm minors in any way;

·       Impersonate any person or entity, including, but not limited to, a TMA official, or falsely state or otherwise misrepresent your affiliation with a person or entity;

·       Forge headers or otherwise manipulate identifiers in order to disguise the origin of any Content transmitted to or through the Web Site;

·       Upload, post, publish, e-mail, reproduce, distribute or otherwise transmit any Content that you do not have a right to transmit under any law or under contractual or fiduciary relationships (such as inside information, proprietary and confidential information learned or disclosed as part of employment relationships or under nondisclosure agreements);

·       Upload, post, publish, e-mail, reproduce, distribute or otherwise transmit any Content that infringes any patent, trademark, trade secret, copyright or other proprietary rights of any party;

·       Upload, post, publish, e-mail, reproduce, distribute or otherwise transmit any unsolicited or unauthorized advertising, promotional materials, ‘junk mail,’ ‘Spam,’ ‘chain letters,’ ‘pyramid schemes,’ or any other form of solicitation;

·       Upload, post, publish, e-mail, reproduce, distribute or otherwise transmit any material that contains software viruses, Trojan horses, worms, time bombs, cancelbots, or any other computer code, files or programs designed to interrupt, destroy, or limit the functionality of any computer software or hardware or telecommunications equipment or any other similarly destructive activity, or surreptitiously intercept or expropriate any system, data or personal information;

·       Engage in any activity that is contrary to or which would adversely affect the purpose or intention of the Web Site or Services, including but not limited to, actually or attempting to manipulate, corrupt or otherwise affect the outcome of the Services, in whole or part, by, among other methods, subscribing another party without their authorization or registering multiple subscriptions under the same or different names;

·       Interfere with or disrupt the Service or servers or networks connected to the Service, or disobey any requirements, procedures, policies or regulations of networks connected to the Service; or

·       Intentionally or unintentionally violate any applicable local, state, national or international law.

 

You also agree that you will not harvest, collect or store information about the users of this Web Site or the Content posted by others on this Web Site or use such information for any purpose inconsistent with the purpose of this Web Site or for the purpose of transmitting or facilitating transmission of unsolicited bulk electronic mail or communications.

You acknowledge that TMA is not responsible for material submitted to. TMA and its designees have the right (but not the obligation) at their sole discretion to refuse or remove any Content, in whole or part, that, in TMA’s judgment, does not comply with these Terms and Conditions or is otherwise undesirable, inappropriate or inaccurate. TMA is not responsible for any failure, non-failure or delay in removing such Content. You will remain responsible for the accuracy, copyright compliance, legality, decency, or any other aspect of such submitted material, including any Contribution or part thereof, or other communication to TMA. You agree to immediately notify TMA of any unauthorized use of the Service or any other breach of security known or suspected by you.

You acknowledge and agree that TMA may, but is in no event obligated to, preserve Content and may also disclose Content if required to do so by law or in the good faith belief that such preservation or disclosure is reasonably necessary to: (a) comply with legal process; (b) enforce these Terms and Conditions; (c) respond to claims that any Content violates the rights of third-parties; or (d) protect the rights, property, or personal safety of TMA, its users or the public.

You understand that the technical processing and transmission of the Web Site, including your Content, may involve (a) transmissions over various networks; and (b) changes to conform and adapt to technical requirements of connecting networks or devices. TMA assumes no responsibility for the deletion or failure to store postings, Contributions or other information submitted by you or other users to the Web Site.

Any or all Content on the Web Site may be purged from time to time in TMA’s sole discretion. You acknowledge and agree that Content you view, submit or post is at your own discretion and risk, including any reliance on the accuracy, completeness, or usefulness of such Content. You acknowledge that you may not rely on any information, data, text, music, sound, photographs, graphics, video, messages or other materials created by TMA or submitted to TMA, including Content. You further acknowledge and agree that the views expressed on the Web Site do not necessarily reflect the views of TMA, and TMA does not support or endorse Content (including any Contribution, whether or not edited by TMA or its designee or presented on the Web Site edited or unedited, in whole or in part, or alone or with other content) posted or submitted by you or any User.

Restrictions On Use of Material

The content on this Web Site is intended for entertainment purposes only. Except as expressly permitted, you agree not to use the Web Site for sale, trade or other commercial purposes, and, you may not modify, copy, publish, display, transmit, adapt or in any way exploit the content of the Web Site. Only if you obtain prior written consent from us — and from all other entities with an interest in the relevant intellectual property — may you publish, display or commercially exploit any material from the Web Site. To seek our permission, you may write to us at our address provided below. If permission is granted by us and by all other entities with an interest in the relevant intellectual property, you may not change or delete any author attribution, trademark, legend or copyright notice.

You must abide by all additional copyright notices or other restrictions contained on the Web Site.

Unsolicited Materials

In operating this site, TMA does not solicit nor does it wish to receive any confidential, secret or proprietary information or other material from you through the Web Site or TMA e-mail addresses, or in any other way. Any information or material submitted or sent to TMA will be deemed not to be confidential or secret. By submitting or sending information or other material to TMA you represent and warrant that the information is original to you and that no other party has any rights to the material.

User’s Grant Of Limited License

By communicating with TMA, including submitting or sending Content, a Contribution or other information or material to the Web Site, you grant TMA the royalty-free, unrestricted, world-wide, perpetual, irrevocable, exclusive and fully sub-licensable right and license to use, reproduce, modify, adapt, publish, translate, create derivative works from, distribute, perform and display such Content (in whole or part), including any information, suggestions, ideas, drawings or concepts contained in such Content, worldwide and/or to incorporate it in other works in any form, media, or technology now known or later developed. Such license includes incorporating a Contribution, in whole or in part, into a TMA feature. You will remain responsible for the accuracy, copyright compliance, legality, decency, or any other aspect of such submitted material, including any Contribution or part thereof, or other communication to TMA.

You also warrant that any “moral rights” in posted materials have been waived.

Intellectual Property Rights

All materials contained in this Web Site are the copyrighted property of TMA and its affiliates or licensors. As between TMA and you, TMA is the sole owner of all content on the Web Site, including without limitation, all applicable U.S. and non-U.S. copyrights, patents, trademarks, and trade secrets, and other intellectual property rights thereto. Except as otherwise specifically provided in these Terms and Conditions, you may not download or save a copy of the Web Site or any portion thereof, for any purpose. You may, however, print a copy of individual screens appearing as part of the Web Site solely for your personal, non-commercial use or records, provided that any marks, logos or other legends that appear on the copied screens remain on, and are not removed from the printed or stored images of such screens. All title and intellectual property rights in and to the content of the Linked Sites is the property of the respective content owner and may be protected by applicable copyright or other intellectual property laws and treaties.

Disclaimer Of Warranties

THE WEB SITE AND SERVICES ARE PROVIDED “AS IS,” “WHERE IS” AND “AS AVAILABLE,” WITHOUT WARRANTY OF ANY KIND, EITHER EXPRESS OR IMPLIED. WITHOUT LIMITATION OF THE FOREGOING, TMA SPECIFICALLY DISCLAIMS ANY AND ALL WARRANTIES, INCLUDING, BUT NOT LIMITED TO: (i) ANY WARRANTIES CONCERNING THE AVAILABILITY, ACCURACY, APPROPRIATENESS, RELIABILITY, TIMELINESS, USEFULNESS, OR OTHERWISE OF THE CONTENT OF THE WEB SITE OR SERVICES; AND (ii) ANY WARRANTIES OF TITLE, WARRANTY OF NON-INFRINGEMENT, WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY OR FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE. THIS DISCLAIMER OF LIABILITY APPLIES TO ANY DAMAGES OR INJURY CAUSED BY THE WEB SITE, INCLUDING WITHOUT LIMITATION AS A RESULT OF (1) ANY ERROR, OMMISSION, DELETION OR DEFECT IN THE CONTENT, OR (2) ANY FAILURE OF PERFORMANCE, ERROR, OMISSION, INTERRUPTION, DELETION, DEFECT, DELAY IN OPERATION OR TRANSMISSION, COMPUTER VIRUS, COMMUNICATION LINE FAILURE, THEFT OR DESTRUCTION OR UNAUTHORIZED ACCESS TO, ALTERATION OF, OR USE OF RECORD, WHETHER FOR BREACH OF CONTRACT, TORT, NEGLIGENCE, DEFAMATION OR UNDER ANY OTHER CAUSE OF ACTION. TMA DOES NOT WARRANT OR GUARANTEE (1) THAT ANY PORTION OF THE WEB SITE WILL BE FREE OF INFECTION BY VIRUSES, WORMS, TROJAN HORSES OR ANYTHING ELSE MANIFESTING CONTAMINATING OR DESTRUCTIVE PROPERTIES; OR (2) THAT ACCESS TO THE WEB SITE WILL BE UNINTERRUPTED OR ERROR-FREE.

TMA DOES NOT WARRANT OR MAKE ANY REPRESENTATIONS REGARDING THE USE OR THE RESULTS OF THE USE OF THE MATERIALS IN THIS WEB SITE. YOU (AND NOT TMA OR ANY OF ITS AGENTS) ASSUME THE ENTIRE COST OF ALL NECESSARY SERVICING, REPAIR OR CORRECTION.

APPLICABLE LAW MAY NOT ALLOW THE EXCLUSION OF IMPLIED WARRANTIES, SO THE ABOVE EXCLUSION MAY NOT APPLY TO YOU.

Limitation Of Liability

IN NO EVENT WILL TMA, ITS OFFICERS, DIRECTORS, EMPLOYEES, AGENTS, SPONSORS, ADVERTISERS, PARENTS, AFFILIATES, SUCCESSORS OR ASSIGNS, BE LIABLE TO ANY PARTY (i) FOR ANY INDIRECT, SPECIAL, PUNITIVE, INCIDENTAL OR CONSEQUENTIAL DAMAGES OR ANY OTHER DAMAGES ARISING IN ANY WAY OUT OF THE AVAILABILITY, USE, RELIANCE ON, OR INABILITY TO USE THE WEB SITE, EVEN IF TMA OR ITS AGENTS SHALL HAVE BEEN ADVISED OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH DAMAGES, AND REGARDLESS OF THE FORM OF ACTION, WHETHER IN CONTRACT, TORT, OR OTHERWISE; OR (ii) FOR ANY CLAIM ATTRIBUTABLE TO ERRORS, OMISSIONS, OR OTHER INACCURACIES IN, OR DESTRUCTIVE PROPERTIES OF THE WEB SITE. BECAUSE SOME STATES OR JURISDICTIONS DO NOT ALLOW THE EXCLUSION OR THE LIMITATION OF LIABILITY FOR CONSEQUENTIAL OR INCIDENTAL DAMAGES, IN SUCH STATES OR JURISDICTIONS, TMA’S LIABILITY SHALL BE LIMITED TO THE EXTENT PERMITTED BY LAW.

Indemnification

Upon a request by TMA, you agree to defend, indemnify and hold TMA, its affiliates, officers, directors and employees harmless from any and all claims, liabilities, costs and expenses, including reasonable attorneys’ fees, arising in any way from your use or misuse of the Web Site or Services, or the uploading, posting, publishing, e-mailing, reproduction, distribution or transmission of any Content or other materials by you or users authorized by you or any violation of these Terms and Conditions by you. TMA reserves the right, at its own expense, to assume the exclusive defense and control of any matter otherwise subject to indemnification by you, in which event you will cooperate with TMA in asserting any available defense.

Applicable Laws / Jurisdiction

You agree that the laws of the State of Michigan, excluding its conflicts-of-law rules, shall govern these Terms and Conditions. Please note that your use of the Web Site may be subject to other local, state, national, and international laws. You expressly agree that exclusive jurisdiction for any claim or dispute with TMA or relating in any way to your use of the Web Site resides in the courts of the State of Michigan, and you further agree and expressly consent to the exercise of personal jurisdiction in the courts of the State of Michigan, in connection with any such dispute and including any claim involving TMA or its affiliates, subsidiaries, employees, contractors, officers, directors, telecommunication providers and content providers.

We control and operate this site from our offices in Detroit, Michigan. We do not represent that materials on the site are appropriate or available in all geographic locations, and accessing such from certain locations may be illegal and prohibited. Persons who choose to access this site from other locations do so on their own initiative, and we are not responsible for compliance with local laws or other applicable laws. You will not access the foregoing where prohibited by law.

Any inquiries concerning these terms and conditions of use should be directed to our contact form.

Provisions unenforceable or invalid

If any part of this agreement is held invalid or unenforceable, that portion shall be construed in a manner consistent with applicable law to reflect, as nearly as possible, the original intentions of the parties, and the remaining portions shall remain in full force and effect.

Assignment

You shall not transfer, assign, sublicense nor pledge in any manner whatsoever, any of your rights or obligations under this Agreement. TMA may transfer, assign sublicense or pledge in any manner whatsoever, any of its rights and obligations under this agreement to a subsidiary, affiliate, or successor thereof or to any third party whatsoever, without notifying you or receiving your consent.

If you have any questions about this policy or our site in general, please contact us at tomyassistant@gmail.com

PRIVACY POLICY:

By submitting information to TMA, you grant TMA a perpetual, royalty-free license to use, reproduce, modify, publish, distribute, and otherwise exercise all copyright and publicity rights with respect to that information at its sole discretion, including incorporating it in any media now known or later developed. If you do not wish to grant TMA these rights, it is suggested that you do not submit information to TMA. TMA reserves the right to select, edit and arrange submissions at its sole discretion. However, we will NEVER spam you or use your email address or your personal information for outside purposes.